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Do you worry that you will never meet someone? Have you tried to date, but nothing ever works out? There are warning signs that indicate you could continue to have problems. Do you know what they are?
WARNING SIGN #1 Disastrous Dates
The first warning sign that you won’t meet someone is when you have a date that you think is a disaster and you focus on the “failure” of it. You may even keep trying to date, but each person seems worse than the last one. You consider this a sure sign that you will be alone the rest of your life, that you are not attractive enough to get the one you want, and, most of all, the one you want doesn’t even exist!
WHAT YOU CAN DO: Shift your thinking from failure to success. You haven’t “lost” anything except some expectations. Look for what you learned. You have gained insight, clarity, and knowledge. You can use these lessons on the path to your True Love. Your single life is not a contest—it’s an adventure. Stop looking at it like it is one impossible event after another. As long as you think of it as a win-lose, you will not feel successful or brave enough to try.
WARNING SIGN #2: Interpreting Every Date As A Rejection
WHAT TO DO: It takes a victim and a victimizer, carefully orchestrating their misery, to be successful in creating the game of rejection. If you don’t play the game, you can’t be rejected. The most that rejection can be, objectively, is someone seeing and sharing that you are not compatible. Say, “Thank you,” let go and move on. How do you keep your dance card full so that one less name on it will barely be missed? Get out often, get out more, and get out and be friendly.
WARNING SIGN #3: Jealousy Consumes You When Someone Else Falls In Love
WHAT TO DO: When you feel jealous of anyone for ANYTHING, look to see what you have not done for you. We feel jealous when we feel deprived, helpless, or like we are not enough. If you are jealous of another person’s success in meeting someone wonderful, ask yourself:
· What have I done lately to meet someone? Do I get out whenever possible, tell lots of people I would like to meet someone, and stay friendly, reaching out in most situations? Be honest. How much have you really done?
· What can I do to feel better about myself? Need a counselor, exercise program, or financial adviser?
· What can I do today to empower myself? Have I de-cluttered recently, or have I eliminated what I have been putting up with?
WARNING SIGN #4: Looking For Someone Else To Make You Happy
WHAT TO DO: Look to see where you can make yourself happy. Singles who are tired of being lonely usually don’t want to hear this. If you are single, you may think all your fears will melt and your problems will be handled when The Perfect One enters your life. When you find The One, and continue not to be happy, you may think it is the other person’s fault. True—the other person may be a jerk or a jerkette—but your unhappiness started with you. Pull your life together, do things that make you proud, and then find someone like you.
WARNING SIGN #5: Projection Onto The Other Person
WHAT TO DO: This is an extremely common mistake single’s make. Many people living alone want to meet someone so much, that when they finally get a date, they read all kinds of values, attitudes, and character traits into the person that just aren’t there. Eventually, they wind up being angry because he or she didn’t live up to the expectations.
These are the five warning signs that can become your new guide to find romance. Give it a try. You deserve to find your love.